FaceBook is a Virus: Twenty-Five Random Things about Me
After I got “tagged” for the third time on Facebook, I started to have chain-letter anxiety. So I figured I’d better create my own list, because I can use all the luck I can get.
I know. A lot of people have had it up to here with these lists, and I don’t blame them.
On the other hand, you have no idea of the number of messages I received about the Pittsburgh Steelers or how much it vexed me to have to search Wiki to find out what the hell a “Terrible Towel” is, so we all have our crosses to bear.
I’ll say one thing in defense of “Twenty-Five Things” lists: It’s not a bad exercise for creative-writing classes or for groups of almost any kind. It works especially well as an “ice-breaker” exercise. Have people write their notes on separate slips of paper and put them in a bowl. Participants then draw slips at random and guess who wrote what. Or make up your own rules.
Twenty-Five Random Things about Me
1. I’ve developed an aversion to the telephone that borders on psychosis and am considering going back to writing letters by longhand.
2. I miss my mother more than my father and think about her often, though for many years the opposite was true.
3. I would dearly love to fall in love with Italy again.
4. I consider bad/careless writing a personal affront, and I’m not kidding when I say I’d levy stiff fines for the rubbish that is increasingly passed off as English; repeat offenders would have to serve time in language-abuse jail.
5. I wish I had become a marine biologist.
6. I’m thrilled when an experience moves me enough to make me cry and I would like it to happen much more often than it does.
7. I’ve made a lot of really stupid decisions in my life, but the decision not to have kids was one of the good ones!
8. Never being able to dedicate regular time to writing is both terribly sad and terribly demoralizing.
9. I miss Buffy.
10. I also miss American food, especially “ethnic” food, and am beyond exasperated by Italian chauvinism regarding their national cuisine.
11. I spend entirely too much time in existential tizzies and quandaries, though I wouldn’t necessarily give them up in favor of a more superficial approach to life (even if it were simultaneously more peaceful).
12. I still think I’m going to finish a Ph.D. before I die.
13. I experience being oppressed by technology and am worryingly addicted to the internet.
14. I always intended to get a lot more tattoos, but at this point I probably won’t.
15. I’ve only had one cavity in my entire life.
16. There are few experiences that make me feel more forlorn and derelict than being cold; conversely, for me there’s almost no such thing as “too hot.”
17. About two months out of three, the full moon drives me almost literally crazy for a few nights.
18. I’m a sucker for Judy, Barbra, Edith, Billie, Cher, Aretha, Patsy and various and sundry divas of their ilk and grandeur, and I don’t mind being a stereotype as long as I get to sing along.
19. I was truly convinced that things were going to turn out a whole lot different.
20. I can’t wait to get back to working in a prison or JD center.
21. Chronic back pain is a wretched, wretched fate.
22. Even after seeing hundreds and hundreds of them, I still get a huge, childish kick out of going to the movies—even more so if I smuggle in homemade popcorn.
23. I’m trying to make peace with the realization that there will be no solution in this lifetime for the fact that the people who are most important to me always live far away—from me and from one another.
24. If I could get them, I’d eat a Hawaiian papaya a day and never be bored!
25. I worry that my Italian isn’t going to get any better than it already is.