Cristiano Ronaldo Comes Out!

I am delighted to bring you this news from, which kindly word-substituted fed through BabelFish translated the following article from an unknown language into the unknown language you can read below.

Soccer fans will be pleased to know that Ronaldo “does not splash alcohol” and that, upon winning his defamation suit against the Daily Mirror, he proudly announced, “I am gay with this outcome.”

Hats off to Ronaldo for his courageous act, in which he joins Irish hurling star Dónal Óg Cusack and rugby champ Gareth Thomas.

(If you want a .pdf version for all posterity, you can download this abomination hanging offense insult to translators article here).

P.S. I would very much like to tell you more about the “sports endowment ceremony,” but the article, alas, is silent.



Cristiano Ronaldo has supposed “substantial” defame indemnification over an wrong journal claim that he had left upon a “bender” during a Hollywood nightclub.

The former Manchester United star additionally perceived an reparation during a High Court in London over claims published in a Daily Mirror in Jul final year.

The justice listened a journal had reported that a winger had “gone upon a bender” in Los Angeles while he recovered from an ankle operation.

Ronaldo does not splash alcohol.

In a matter released by his solicitor, he said: “I am gay with this outcome.

“I take precision as well as liberation from damage really severely as well as would never have ‘gone upon a bender’ as well as danced in a nightclub but my crutches as a Mirror secretly claimed.”

The article, entitled “Ron The Lash” was published with a sketch of Ronaldo upon crutches in Los Angeles.

He had trafficked there to attend a sports endowment ceremony.

The paper pronounced a star had splashed out £10,000 during a nightclub upon champagne as well as vodka for friends as well as models, carrying himself already dipsomaniac 4 eyeglasses of red booze progressing in a dusk over a meal.

QC Ronald Thwaites told a court: “The inform pronounced that after upon in a nightclub he drank a series of vodka as well as sodas prior to switching to bottles of champagne.

“It described how a single clubber claimed to have seen him chuck his crutches down upon a building as well as try to dance upon his uninjured foot.”

Mr Thwaites continued: “In fact, a law is that a events did not occur as reported.

“Although a petitioner was in LA as well as he did attend a nightclub in question, he did not splash any ethanol during all while there.

“He does not splash ethanol since he takes his health, aptness as well as liberation from damage really seriously.

“Nor did he chuck his crutches to a building as well as try to dance.

“He sat in a in isolation dilemma underneath a caring as well as organisation of a reputable Portuguese inhabitant group physiotherapist, Antonio Gaspar.”

Zoe Norden, barrister for publishers MGN Limited, told a judge: “Through me the
defendant offers a apologies to a petitioner for a distress, annoyance as well as corruption caused by this article.

“The suspect accepts that a allegations have been fake as well as ought never to have been published.

“It is thus happy to set a jot down true as well as to apologize to a claimant.”

In his statement, Ronaldo said: “I felt we had no preference to proceed as well as aspire to these authorised proceedings.

“I would similar to to appreciate Sir Alex Ferguson as well as a others who were ready to crop up as witnesses along with me during a hearing that had been due to begin today.”

Ronaldo has longed for multiform new matches for his stream bar Real Madrid due to injury.


Posted on 4 January 2010, in Crimes Against Translation and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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