Why I Favor Marriage Between Conservative Christians

I am 100% in favor of marriage between Conservative Christians.

In my view, it is both a mistake and an injustice to attempt to prevent them from marrying others of their own kind if they choose to do so. Evangelical Christianity is not a sickness.

Although many people say they do not like them and although their ways may seem odd or strange to us, Conservative Christians are people and deserve to enjoy the same rights as everyone else, just as if they were, for example, computer programmers or members of normal gay and lesbian families.

Of course I am aware that much of the behavior of Conservative Christians, such as their insistence upon identifying sexuality as the root of all evil, may seem foreign to us, as do certain aspects of their personalities. I am aware that questions are occasionally raised regarding issues of public health and safety—for example because of their dangerous and willful attempts to defund HIV-education programs for young people and to block access to life-saving condoms. We also know that many of their customs, such as the public exhibition of bloody and disturbing images of torture and death, are objectionable to many of us. Each of these stereotypes, however, is much more the result of sensationalistic images created and promulgated by the media than it is a reflection of reality, and such stereotypes are not a good reason to deny Conservative Christians the right to marry.

Some may argue that a marriage between Conservative Christians is not a true marriage because it is no more than a dogma-based form of religious brainwashing rather than a consensual civil agreement made between two mature, informed, intellectually free individuals.

A typical Conservative Christian Wedding

What is more, given that sexual relations (and, naturally, pregnancies) outside of wedlock are mercilessly condemned by the Evangelical Christian Church, there are those who would argue that, if Conservative Christians were permitted to marry one another, the number of artificial or “shotgun” marriages would increase, as would marriages whose only purpose is to secure regular access to a sex partner (something Conservative Christians cannot otherwise find because of their religious beliefs). Such marriages, the argument goes, would increase cases of domestic violence as well as lead to an explosion in the number of at-risk families. We should keep in mind, however, that such phenomena do not occur exclusively among Conservative Christians. More importantly, none of us can truly know what it is like to live another’s life and, as a result, we can neither fairly judge their behavior nor fully understand the reasons behind it.

In addition, insisting that “unions” among Conservative Christians do not deserve to be called marriages, but should be referred to with some other term, is nothing more than an attempt to deflect the issue by turning it into a semantic problem. In fact, such an approach is both irrelevant and even somewhat petty. A marriage is a marriage and a family is a family!

Having touched upon the subject of family, I want to consider another volatile issue, which I hope will not strike readers as overly radical: I am also in favor of allowing Conservative Christians to adopt children. I realize this is a suggestion that some will find outrageous. In fact, some of you are probably already thinking, “Let Conservative Christians adopt children?!? And what happens if those children turn out to be Conservative Christians themselves when they grow up?!”

In responding to such concerns, we should be honest and say that it is, in fact, quite true that the children of Conservative Christians are extremely likely to become Conservative Christians (unlike the children of gay people or computer programmers). As we’ve already made clear, however, Conservative Christians are human beings just like the rest of us. Further, notwithstanding strongly held opinions and anecdotal evidence, there is no proof whatsoever that parents who are Conservative Christians are less well prepared to raise children than anyone else, nor that religious fanaticism in the home necessarily has a negative influence on a child.

In the event that problems should arise, however, the family courts will evaluate individual cases, which is exactly what they are empowered to do: determine the suitability of potential adoptive parents.

In conclusion, though I respect the fact that there are divergent opinions on these matters, I believe that we must allow Conservative Christians to marry one another and to adopt children, should they choose to do so.

Just the way we do with computer programmers and gay people.


Adapted and localized from Franco Buffoni’s Laico alfabeto in salsa gay piccante. L’ordine del creato e le creature disordinate [A Secular Alphabet in Gay Sauce Piquant: The Orderly Creation and its Disorganized Creatures]. Transeuropa: 2010. 


Posted on 2 August 2012, in Queer ... Plus All Those Acronyms, The Republican Teahad, You Can Always Count on a Little Homophobia and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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